Just the 2 of us, we can make it if we try...

By the tune of grover washington... i lay in my first official lonely day thinking, with a really sad smile how it will from now on... As a comet angel my “best friend” appeared to asking how i was feeling. Without knowing my situation she was able to feel that something wasn't ok... she is weird she always makes stuffs like that even been away.
While i was talking to her i was thinking that she past for a similar situation in the past and when i was strong i was able to help her. Unfortunately, women are stronger than men in the “emotional department” reason that was easier for her to over past... after all the chat i was thinking that my previous behavior was completely wrong and funded in the wrong statements... reason that i can understand why my girlfriend lost the hope in me. Maybe is just her defense mechanism that is acting now activated for a situation she was able to compare suffered in the past...
with an ironic smile i can understand that most of my frustration and impotence is just based in the fact that i fell not capable enough to consort that soul and i lost myself in my impotence... but, as Grover Washington says in his song “just the 2 of us can build a castle in the sky” i cant stop thinking that if there any problem we can handle it together....
but as a sharp knife i found out that in her peculiar way, that was she was trying to assimilate little by little with her calls and her messages between lines of affection. I become blind and pressure her in the wrong way and as a gel bag she just broke for the weakest place... beside the attitude of new year shows her that even the angels can become mortal if the pain is too hard...
I feel like nicholas case after loosing meg ryan in city of angel, i sacrificed everything and when i was present to progress and have a future with the person i love the destiny makes a really tortuous moment and grab her from my side leaving me alone. Most of the fault is in my slowness to interact in a human world and how i let my self to fall in its worst attitudes... now i feel that i lost a fight without playing my cards... just like that guy in the stephan rad program who lost for been afraid to loosing. I don't blame my love one for taking this attitude, but as i told her i'm afraid that in my wait someone present, confort her and eventually take her away.... like accidentally i was able to have it by my side...
what ever happens i should take it as a man, but maybe my best friend is right... as long as the feeling is there no matter what kind of confusions and problems we had in past we can go on... but as grove washington said “ just the 2 of us, we can make it if we try”

Still the road keeps on telling me, to go on.
Something is pulling me.
I feel the gravity, of it all.

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