foggy day thoughts

With the music of kotoko (re-sublimity) I get once more in this train full of people ready for another day of work. Thinking a bit about what classes are now, I can't stop thinking that i was in a way never giving the 100% in my classes. Now i feel again in some kind of advantaje of my other classmates but is just because one of the students decided to finish the book by himself in oder to jump one level.

When I saw his movement, i got pretty impressed how easy is to do that. In the other side, that makes me think about some of the new classmates and their attitude against the study. The „newbies“, have a pretty awkward attitude against the learning. Concidering that they might have the posibility of simply, by living here for a long term, they will be able to learn the language. Is funny how to see the relaxed attitude against everything and how one of them deal with the nervousness. Like when I was in my japanese classes, this guys start to laugh and makes funny faces when they dont know what we are talking about in class. Is that a standarized way to react of gay people against the pessure? Indeed I still not sure, but I think that might be concidering that all the gay people I know acts like that once they are in a situation i don't know.

But well backing up to my classes stuff, looks that what leesha said once that one day we will wake up and be able to commnicate is comming true. Everytime I try to think in this language I get blocked and simply switch to english. However, if I act unconciously everything flows propertly. Like yesterday, in the Mediestadt station i was just there waiting for the train to go to cross berlin and a couple just came and made some questions about the trains and the stations. With a natural response i was able to orientate the guys without faults at all. For a second I saw myself in 3rd person talking with the people normaly and thinking „damn i'm speaking german!“. Was pretty funny due the guy was pretty lost and he was pretty clear which trains had to take to get to mitte (i learn almost every route now). The couple was so happy for the help that made me feel a bit proud of myself. But funnier was that when the train arrived the man said „muchas gracias“ with his typic accent and was pretty funny concidering that i never said anything in spanish before. Maybe I look too latin haha.

All this makes me think the long list of mistakes i commit here and i think that one of the biggest was the fact of alienate myself for a long time. The simple fact of have no one to talk after school is a complete delay in the learning experience. I feel that there is not so much difference compared to when i was learning japanese in Panama, concidering that i use to speak japanese with the people in some restaurant and every day at class. But well is something i have to deal with now in this to next months. Mmmm indeed that is one of the disadvantages of living alone. I have some plans for this month so lets see how things goes now.

Indeed looks that my live is divided in a time to commit mistakes and time to repair them, over again, just by myself.


Chao pescao!

Comentarios

Publicar un comentario

Entradas populares de este blog

El regalo de Mayauru

El hada Mayauru perdió su memoria y debido a eso se fue a vivir sola en una colina en el bosque. Con el tiempo, una niña solitaria fue a la colina y se hicieron amigas. La niña llamo a muchos otros niños y se hicieron amigos del hada para jugar… Como Mayauru no era humana ella envejeció más lentamente. Los niños fueron creciendo y con el tiempo se olvidaron de Mayauru… Al final solo quedaba la niña que conoció al principio… Pero esta niña también creció y se volvió una adulta, y debido a eso no pudo jugar más con Mayauru. Sin embargo, aunque era una adulta la niña no pudo olvidarse completamente de Mayauru y volvió. Y entonces Mayauru le dio a la niña de mirada triste un regalo. El regalo fue palabras de despedida, Hasta entonces los humanos no conocían las palabras de despedida. Mayauru era el Hada de las despedidas. Ella había olvidado eso y era por eso que solo daba adioses… La niña, ahora adulta, aprendió las palabras de despedida de Mayauru. Y sabiendo estas palabras la niña f
Leer más

Todo puede cambiar con algo tan simple....

Hoy, un día de trabajo normal en el cual tuve que ir a colon a el tipico mantenimiento mensual de uno de nuestros clientes. El trabajo normal, salian problemas, los solucionaba. Tenían dudas, las respondía. Mi nivel de eficiencia impecable. Pero nada de eso me asombra ya. La gente incluso piensa que soy una especie de enciclopedia informática capaz de arreglar cualquier inconveniente, incluso los que no me conciernen como los de la compañía de Internet que llego hoy a arreglar la red caída y terminé dándoles la solución para que me dejaran trabajar para irme rapido. Incluso a puerta cerrada logre otro acuerdo con el mismo dueño de la compañía acerca de otro negocio muy interesante para mi compañía. Me siento feliz por todo esto? Na, todo da igual. Es como si fuera tan predecible y vació todo este proceso que ha perdido su magia para mí. Por que lo sigo entonces? Pues por que es parte de mi sueño y pienso que es la parte difícil del mismo y que en un futuro cambiará. Por lo general cua
Leer más

A new episode, a new Hope

Just sitting in this chair, i realized that tomorrow at this hour, an old guy will be opening my knee and replacing stuffs in it. it is kind of ironic situation for someone who 10 years before declared himself as indestructible. When my knee finally gave up to the situation I realized that time will always take care of those things we don`t take care of. For example, career, health, relationships and even empires.  But what makes us loose sight of such important things? So many reason  that describe us as human, for example, routine, arrogance, pride, and so on.  But after the effect of the narcotics a new time will start, not only as healthier person but  as a more honest person, not with the world but with myself. ja ne!
Leer más